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Today I watched a movie about North Koreans trying to escape from the horrible life they led. And I cried, and sobbed, and my heart ripped apart and basically broke multiple times throughout the whole movie.

What makes it worse is that that movie didn't even go into detail of the horrors the North Korean people must face there. It's even worse than the conditions the movie showed. And that makes me cringe.

I. HATE. The North Korean government. I hate all the soldiers who DARE to beat or kill the precious human lives that they seem to think they own. I hate Kim Jung Il and Kim Il Sung. And I hate those who say that North Korea's right. I know, hard to believe people outside of North Korea would say that their form of government is correct, even seeing the atrocities that are committed. But there are people who still support North Korea. Those sick, twisted, convoluted minds.

My heart was broken all day today. It's still broken. That movie was based on a true story, and that kills me.

There is a holocaust happening right now. Except this time the entire world knows clearly what's going on, and yet is not doing anything definite about it. In the mid-1990s, ONE MILLION North Koreans starved to death. This statistic shouldn't even exist.

I wonder if what's left of my relatives in N. Korea are ok. If they're still alive. If they've been brainwashed. Maybe some escaped to China. Unlikely.

It's a holocaust.

Obsessions

I have obsessions. It's how I work. I obsess about a certain manga, a certain anime, a certain book, a certain band/artist, a certain movie, a certain video game and its plotline..... I obsess about a lot of things. Usually my obsessions come one by one - I rarely obsess about multiple things at the same time - that's too much intense passion about too many things at once.

After a while I'll fall out of love of whatever it was that I was so in love with, and I'll either drop it or at least stop obsessing about it. But usually it's still in my heart somewhere. I remember it and cherish it.

I'm going to try to remember all of my obsessions.

In music: Yellowcard, Evanesance, Trapt, Three Days Grace, Philip Wickham, Switchfoot, Hairspray the musical, Rent, the All American Rejects, the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack. etc etc.

In hobbies: Knitting and origami.

In movies: The Phantom of the Opera, Hercules the Disney movie (I think I watched this movie everyday for 2 or 3 weeks straight, my freshman or sophomore year of high school...), The Little Mermaid the Disney movie... a lot more that for some reason I can't think of right now. :/

I would post my obsessions in manga or anime, but I realized that right now those are not what I'd define as "obsessions," as all those that I listed are no longer my life's passion and joy. Manga and anime are still a great part of my life that I enjoy, and HAS been for years, so I suppose it's not an ephemeral obsession... although I used to knit for years before dropping it, as well as do origami for years, so we'll see...

My lated obsession is with this movie called Howl's Moving Castle, by Mayao Miyazaki. I LOVE Miyazaki's works - I think all the ones I have seen are amazing and ... just amazing. He always pulls you into a completely magical, fantastical world that you can't help watching and get absorbed in. I've had slight obsessions with his other movies before, but this one is a pretty big obsession. I can tell that I'm in the midst of it and it is only just beginning... oh boy.

I won't talk about the plot of the movie b/c I'm an anti-spoiler nazi and I want anyone who hears of this movie to watch it w/o spoilers. But I guess I can advertise for it a bit, cuz I love it so much.

Howl's Moving Castle is about a girl named Sophie, perhaps around 18 or 19, who's pretty quiet, solitary, and responsible and works in her late father's hat shop. She hates it, but she feels a sense of duty to work there. One day she is almost... er.. assaulted(?) by two soldiers in the city (their kingdom is on the verge of war, so there are a lot of soldiers everywhere), but she's rescued by a handsome wizard named Howl. She's not sure if his intentions are good or bad, because he's so mysterious, but he helps her anyhow. Late that night the Witch of the Waste visits her shop and casts a curse on Sophie, because the Witch of the Waste is enemies with Howl and her spies had seen them together. Sophie runs away from the city in her curse and tries to find Howl to help her break the spell.

A bunch of amazing things happen and I cannot properly describe this movie to you to make you understand how good it is. It's filled with (obviously) wizards and witches, warring kingdoms, demons, curses, magic, beautiful scenes of nature, love, humor, and a lot of other things. :)

Oh dear... I went off on my obsession again... anyway... I think the reason I'm obsessed with this movie is because of the love story in it. I love this love story. It's so unique and precious to me for some reason. Perhaps it's cuz I see a lot of myself in Sophie, and I wish I'd meet someone like Howl? I love Howl - he's awesome. Sure there are parts in the movie where (when my little bro and I were watching it together) my little brother went, "Ugh..." and I went, "Omygosh he's so cool! 8D" - but I love the love story... GAH IT'S SO GOOD.

Oh my. The point of this blog wasn't supposed to be about Howl's Moving Castle - it was supposed to be about my obsessions in general and what I think it says about my character... oh well... got a little sidetracked there. ^^;;

Anyway, I was thinking before I'd written this blog at all, that I love things fiercely and with great passion. It's in my nature to do so, I suppose. But after a while I kind of stop... and find something else. I was thinking that I hope I don't go through this pattern with boys. Once I find a boy, LOL. I don't want to love so fiercely that I burn out after a while... I hope I have a love that burns steadily and not chaotically, and so dangerously that it might put itself out.

Well, for now I'm still madly in love with Howl-- I mean Howl's Moving Castle, haha... I wonder how long it will last.